The Goonies are good enough for me.  So if they make a sequel I will bitch about how it will never live up to the original.  (But inside my heart is full.) Spoken in perfect Spanish.

Friends will come.  Friends will go.  But reruns live forever.

I imagine heroine is a lot like taco dip.  Just not as sheik.

If you tan, don’t use a filter, you will look like the Tan Mom.

All the parts that you run from, all the parts that you keep secret.  Those are your power.  Flip the switch.

Sometimes while living in the north and after a few cocktails, I like to throw in southern words like “molasses” and “outdoorsy” with a southern accent.

Here is a fun way to teach Geography to your kids.  Watch a movie.  Find the location and show it to them on a map.  If you are in the area make it a point to visit the location.

Never tell me to get off my phone.  All I hear is Blah…Blah…Blah.  Want my attention, say Star Wars.

The worst part of trying to put one of my southern words into a sentence is, it has to be manipulated.  It has to be thought out.  So you just can’t throw it in to everyday conversation, you have to wait with urgency.  It kinda goes like this:

Guest: What kind of beer is this?

Me: (in a terrible Southern Accent with Dueling Banjos in the background)  It’s the kind of beer that is made of hops that can be found on the side of a cotton field near the Orton Plantation in the Eastern Southern tip of North Carolina.  Can’t you just taste the outdoorsy flavor as it makes you slur your words slower then molasses from the magnolia tree. (?) 

I waited two hours to inject that into the conversation.  It also makes me realize I should not have that much time by myself, and to take the Coors Light label off next time.

Finally and in all sincerity, one of the best things I have realized from having children is…remembering that peas and potatoes are the Fred and Ginger of vegetables especially when dancing together.